Waiting For The Doors
by Serenity Takaishi
Summary: haha, this is just a bunch of funny skits & random junk i put together about the furuba cast! It's kinda funny, but, if you want more chappies, just ask me!
1. It Broke

Ren: well, this is for stupidity reasons only! okay?  
Keo: yea, we read this funny thing by MacarenaNeji & it was funny!  
Ren: so, we decided to make our own version... it won't be as good though!

* * *

**Waiting For The Doors  
Chapter One: It Broke  
**_Serenity Takaishi_

"Yuki!" a out of breath Tohru came running in the house! "I think I broke Kyo!"

Yuki turned around, a smile on his face, "Really? Where is he?!" Yuki asked, excitedly.

"The door!" A frantic Tohru answered.

They both ran towards Shigure's front door.

"Who broke my house?" Shigure asked.

"Why are you in a ballerina's tutu?" Yuki asked sad that Kyo wasn't broken.

"Aaya gave it to me as a birthday present!" Shigure started to twirl around, ignoring the cat that was on the porch, half dead.

"Aaya!?" Yuki ran in the house and locked the broken door. "Yes, this is good, he won't get in here now," he twitched.

"Tohru, what are you doing?" Kyo asked, suddenly coming from no where, drinking Dr. Pepper.

"KYO!" Yuki jumped through the regular door, breaking it, into Kyo's arms.

"What do you want rat?" Kyo asked, holding his Dr. Pepper away from the blue-haired boy.

Then, Hana and Uo-Chan appeared. "Cool, Dr. Pepper." Hana said, as she stole the bottle from the cat, that was fighting off Yuki.

"No!!" a whale came from the other side of the broken door. "It broke! I broke the pink frilliness off my tutu!" Shigure cried, as Tohru ran to his rescue.

"There wasn't a manly word in that sentence," Uo-Chan announced, passing the Dr. Pepper to Hana.

At last, Kyo freed himself of Yuki, but, from under the broken door came Kagura. Of course, she immediately jumped for him, causing there to be more damage done to Shigure's house. The front porch, was no longer intact.

"The waves coming from inside the house, they are remarkable..." Hana said, peering Tohru the double, and now broken, doors.

"AHH! A spider!" Kyo screamed as he got up and ran towards Yuki, hiding behind him.

Kyo jumped into the rat's arms, "Hold me!"

"Yuki! How could you, I thought Akito was like gonna kill Tohru if you cheated on him again..." Kagura stopped chasing Kyo, and snapped a base beam, thinking of what the 'God' had previously said.

"Did someone say my name?" Akito appeared from behind Kagura.

"Nope... wait, who are you?" Uo-Chan asked throwing the empty bottle at his head.

"I'm Akito Sohma... Head of the family! You imbacle... that hurt." he then, falls to the ground, whimpering about his head.

"Haha, that's so what you get!" Kyo jumps out of Yuki's grip and steps on Akito.

"Does anyone have pink thread?" Tohru came running out of the house, tripping on the door that lay on the ground.

Yuki catches her, then he transforms. "Tohru, quickly, put me down your shirt!" Yuki squeaked, as Tohru did as she was told.

"You never saw anything... nothing at all. Just a broken tutu... nothing happened... HA!" Tohru ran inside, tripping over the door, landing face first into the ground.

"Quickly!" Shigure came out with nothing but leotards on. "Hatori is exhausted!"

"What'd you do?" Akito asked, being to sob heavier.

"Um, well, don't ask, but, he lost all his energy!" Shigure said, panting.

"Did someone say spider?" Spider-man showed up, spandex and all.

"Little late," Uo said, throwing a Dr. Pepper bottle at his head.

"I'm sorry, it's the spandex, okay? It's itchy!! GOSH!! No body loves me anymore!"

Akito's eyes widened, "Me too!" he wrapped his arms around the tall man.

"Man, I never knew it would end this way!" Spider-man yelled, sobbing on the shoulder of the leader.

Akito hugged him tighter"Yea!! I know... I thought I'd rule the world before I died!"

"Okay... jeez, how old are you?" Spider-man paused his weeping for a moment.

"Like 17... but it's okay... Spider man Spider man you can do what Spiders CAN!" Akito broke out into song.

"Wow... I love you!" Anf Spider-man had one more youngish fan thing.

"Everyone, there is something going on inside..." Hana said, as she walked over the broken wood.

"Yea, to the inside," Everyone yelled in unison. They all went forward, but tumbled, and fell, tripping over the door.

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**:-:Authoress' Note:-:**

Ren: Well, if you like it, I'll go on... but, if you don't, then--  
Keo: We'll stop!  
Ren: Yea, even just one view & we'll keep it u-  
Keo: Plus, ideas are welcome!  
Ren: You're read, please review!


	2. Ice Cream & Tazors

Ren: yo... welcome back...  
Keo: neither of us thought this was funny, but, 2 people did-  
Ren: so, we're to continue it! haha, we...  
Keo: & we have no idea how to spell tazor! help!?

_...dedicated to..._  
**tohrukun92126**  
hey, thanks for the first review &  
for telling me to go one! YAY!

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**Waiting For The Doors  
Chapter Two: Ice Cream & Tazors  
**_Serenity & Keo_

Tohru was horrified by the sight of the fallen sea horse, who was without water, "Hatori! What happened!?"

Shigure moved away, without being seen, making sure no one could blame this on him. _'To the bathroom... I need to get my other dress!'_

"Wait,Shigure, where in the heck are you going?" Spider-man asked, sitting on the floor, Akito beside him.

"Well... Nothing! You never saw me!" Shigure took out a tazor and threw it at the 'super hero' and quickly ran away.

"AHH!" Spider-man yelled, getting hit by the black and blue sparkly device.

"This isn't even turned on..." Kyo picked up the tazor, then threw it at Akito's head. "Ha ha, take that b-word!" Running away, Kyo ran towards the back doors, but, tripped over Yuki in doing so. He'd changed back, a little while before everyone came inside.

While all this was happening, Hana and Uo were sitting beside Tohru, wondering why she was freaking out over the half dead sea creature. "Tohru, what is the matter?" Hana asked, putting her hand on the shoulder of her frantic pal.

She must've not noticed her helping friends, for Tohru was aiding the member of the zodiac. "Hatori!!" she began to sob, as she rushed into the bathroom.

"Spider-man! Hold me!" Akito hugged him, crying in pain from the unlit tazor.

"Ow, I'm in pain," Spider-man yelped, holding the young boy.

Yuki looked at everyone who was acting stupid, "Well..." he was silent for a moment, "what is with everyone?"

"Yuki, dear brother! How much I've missed you!" Amyame came storming in, from the back, Kyo in hand.

With wide eyes, Yuki ran towards his brother, "Oh my, I've missed you so!!" tears began to form in the teen's eyes.

"Hell is so far from frozen..." Kyo whispered, getting away from all the people in the room.

"So... orangey, what happened?" Uo's voice broke out of all the crazy people.

"..." Dot dot dot, that's all he could say, so the room was quiet, well, not really, because, the sobs of many people were making it hard for anyone to think.

Tohru came back, breaking the silence, "Why are all these dots just floating around?" her eyes got big, "I need cleaning supplies!

Everyone looked at her in disbelief - sweatdrops.

"Ninja like skills!" Kyo jumped into the air and attempted to karate chop Uo... it was, of course a failed mission.

"Ha ha, no tacos for you!" Uo yelled, grabbing Kyo's arm and throwing him against the floor, hard. This, of course broke the floor, and that was Shigure's queue.

"You want it, you can't explain! Stop breaking my house," the writer sung as he walked in, with an unusual dress on. It had green frilliest, and was dark purple, about knee length.

"That's nice! I love you!" Amyame ran towards his latest creation.

"Do you shave your legs?" Tohru was on her knees, scrubbing the fallen dots. At the sight of Shigure's smooth legs, she became curious.

With a wet face, Shigure ran out of the room, yelling. "No... why is everyone so mean to me?"

"Um, so, is that a yes?" Uo asked Hana.

"The waves say yes," she smiled (scaring everyone in the room).

"Well, not that everyone is on the other side of the room, can someone tell me what happened to the sea horse?" Uo asked, sitting down.

Everyone was silent, Hana still had a smile on her face. "So, is that... go look around?" Hana asked, walking towards them.

"NO!!!! Please stop there!" Spider-man begged, getting a little closer to the wall.

"Okay, we'll just go look around." Uo said, going off, skipping her way to the staircase. Hana followed, putting the normal look back on her face.

"Aaya... are you not coming with me? Hatori is better now! Let's party!" Shigure said, looking into the room. "Wait, how'd the back door get busted?"

All the faces... which is about I have no idea how many people... went blank, they hadn't even noticed the Kagura that was attached to Kyo's leg.

"It's like a dog!" Kisa said, walking out from behind Shigure!

"YAY!! Kisa!! I've missed you," Tohru dropped the bucket to hug her little friend, well, sister.

"I was in the hood, so, I thought I'd drop by... Hiro came too..." She smiled, pulling out an ice cream cone, without ice cream on it. As she began to lick it, Hiro came in.

"I want an ice cream cone..." Kyo whined, getting closer to Kisa, who was getting protective of her sugar cone.

"Man... i want some ice cream," Spider-man said, getting up and doing some web-slinging action. "I'm off to ice cream!"

"Wait! Get me some!!" Kyo yelled, jumping on his back, "GO!" he yelled, getting pulled off by Akito.

"Yea right... Come on Spidey," Akito jumped on and they were off to see the ice cream man...

"This is slightly odd..." Haru came through the door, open arms to Yuki.

"Yea, I know hun..." Yuki answered.

Wait, what? All eyes were on the two in the door way, arch thing. That was very unusual. "What?" Hiro asked, surprised.

"Back off you stupid cat!" Kisa yelled, throwing random things at Kyo, who was attacking her.

"So, Tohru, how's it been for you lately?" Hiro gazed at the 'beauty' that was still cleaning the dots up. But, along with eh dots, there were sounds, like boom and crash.

"I'm cleaning... HELP!!!!" Tohru yelled at the words began to pile up on her. "No... I don't want to die under a pile of words... I mean, come one, what lame actions, at least get better ones."

"Like black!" the announcement came from Yuki who was now sitting on Haru's lap.

"That's an adjective," A hand met Yuki's face. It was Kyo's, who was thrown by the young Kisa across the room.

"What are you talking about, a dumb cat? You're a cat too!"

Kyo didn't have much left to say when Yuki was thrown off of Haru's lap, by Haru. This was because Haru was about to go black, or dark, on Kyo's poor soul.

"Hey... I want some ice cream," Yuki said, making everyone sweatdrop. But, no one really cared, cecause they were on either Kyo's or Haru's side, cheering.

* * *

**:-:Authoress' Note:-:**

Ren: yea, it was lame, I know...  
Keo: but, it was updated fast...  
Ren: hopefully, it gets some more people reading!!  
Keo: That song that Shigure was singing, it was Champagne by Sugarcult...  
Ren: Yea, & Fruits Basket isn't mine, nor is Sugarcult. great band though!  
Keo: Please, you've read, now review!  
Ren: (ohh... should i change the rating????)


	3. Thoughts

Ren: Well, I thought about finishing up a different story, but...  
Keo: Some reviewers are sooooooooooo rude!!  
Ren: So, if you like this, thank you sooo much! It means a lot to me!  
Keo: we don't own furuba!

* * *

**Waiting For The Doors  
Chapter Three: Thoughts  
**_Inbred - Serenity_

"YEA!! Come on Haru!" Kisa yelled, jumping up and down with a giant red foam finger that said cow's are #1.

"Oww, Haru, that hurt..." Yuki stood up, holding an ice cream cone in his hand, licking it as he walked over to Kyo. "And because of you were so rude, I'm choosing Kyo... even though he is a rat, and ugly, and has horrible highlights... and make-up is off a bit... and never mind! Haru, I'm sorry!"

Haru looked up at Kyo, a smirk on his face, "I so am better looking than you."

Kyo's eyes widened, then he turned his head, and he found Ritsu standing there in a classic yellow kimono. "Oh, Kyo, I'm sorry, did I scare you... or hurt your thinking process? Oh my, are you cold because of the door... that I didn't open... but it was already broke, I'm sorry!"

"Ritsu!" Tohru, almost jumping into his arms, but, was pulled down by more words, but this time, adjectives.

Yuki looked up from his melting ice cream. "See, black did work Haru," Yuki smiled, going back to the sugar cone.

"Oh, Tohru, I'm so sorry, would you like me to help you!" he was now on the wooden floor, using his long, yellow kimono to help sweep up all the distracting and annoying words.

"Please, Miss Writer ma'am, please stop using al those adjectives, you are hurting poor Tohru!" Ritsu spoke up. "Oh, I'm sorry, was that rude, I didn't meant to be so harsh!"

"Would you shut up!" Kyo walked up and poked the red head, making him squeak and fall to the ground.

"Oh, i'm glad you decided to listen to me!" Shigure came out from the door, his hair staticy.

"What happened?" Hatori came out next, his hair parted down the middle, causing his hair to fall straight down, his eyes completely covered. Somehow though, he could tell someone was fighting over something.

"Oh, poor Tohru!" Ritsu was up again, trying to dig her out. But, he wasn't really sure where she was, all he could see was a few fingure tips fridgeting up friom the layered on adjectives.

"Uhmm hanfic tricken tor hlon!" that was the sounds that were coming out of the buried Tohru. As I said before she was completely consumed by the adjectives, that seemed to be pliling up on top of each other. Even though I haven't used many adjectives in the past few sentences... I wonder, can anyone find all the decripitive words... that were in the last three 'paragraphs'? Starting NOW! (tell me in your review)

"Can we get back to the fight?" Ayame asked, looking up at the ceiling, he was currently standing behind Hatori, bruching his hair. He was looking at Yuki, the ice cream still had not been eaten, or melted.

"YAY! Come on K..." Shigure thought a moment, he wasn't too sure of who to route for, he liked Kyo, but love Kisa. "Kisa!?" he asked himself, also looking at Yuki's ice cream. He wanted some and the freezer was all out. Maybe if he could find Tohru, she could make some home made ice cream. That was it, he was starting to drool now, so Amyame came up and poked him. That little poke caused him to fall over, trampling Kyo. Who'd be standing next to an old man dreaming about ice cream anyways?

"Help, Tohru?" she yelled, Shigure not moving or anything. Like, what else could he do anyway? That was a lme line... Wow, I need to stop randomly talking in the middle of a serious sentence.

"Serious? Are you sereious?" Keo spoke up.

"WE have the same name?" Kyo said, glaring at Kisa, a smirk on his face.

"Whoa, we do! That's so cool!" Keo ran towards Kyo, who was now glancing over at the ice cream that was almost gone. I think he wants some... Hm, maybe, lets go into his mind. (dun dun dun)

'I really want some ice cream... or maybe it's the way Yuki looks eating the ice cream. Yummy, I mean, the ice cream that is. Well, even though he is the rat, he's goregous... So's this new person, who has a cool name. Mine is better though, it's spelled with a Y. NEAT! Hot potatoe, hot potatoe... Hey, what's that noise? Is that me.. talking about Yuki? Shit, damn author!' That was Kyo's mind, now, into the mind of some other unwilling victim! I am now laughing menically, in case anyone was curious...

That was mind, now, into the mind of some other unwilling victim! I am now laughing , in case anyone was curious...

'Help, ow! Another word! Help. Ow, I wish that Ritsu knew he was on my stomach. I mean my hand is here, so he shouldn't be there. It's quike easy to remeber. And I smell ice cream, I really samoe some mint chocolate chip. Uh, ow, that was painful. DAMN! Oh, yea, this is suposed to be K+ or something, oh well. No one can hear my thoughts, so everything is well. Wait, Yuki is hott, so's Hatori, and Akito, and Haru, and Keo, and Kyo... oh, the word black is blue, that's funny!' That is a place more messed up and more random then my mind. Creepy, hey... I want some ice cream. KEO?!

"What?" Keo answered me.

Help Ritsu get Tohru, I want ice cream. I'm such a nice person... who is now going into someone else's mind. This shall be fun, I'm only doing this becuase it takes up room and I'm printing off a two hundred page story. I feel special, plus, I'm almost out of uink and it's not close to being done! (Anyways, on with the story - the fight scene...)

"Ow, but wait!" Shigure broke out into song.

"Yes, oh yes?" Sitsu asked jumping up, standing beside him.

"We're making a song up... ready?" Shigure smiled, getting a top hat and cane.

There pale face of Ritsu frowned, "Oh, why can't we just sing What's My Age Again by Blink 182 (not ours!)"

"Okay! I took her out, it was a Friday night! We walked alone to get the feeling right, we started making out, then she took off my pants, but then I turned on the T.V. and that's about the times she walked away from me! Nobody likes you when you're 23 and you still act like you're in freshman year!" THey started the begining, but were stopped by the scen that was starting over.

"That was weird, you're gouing down cat!" Haru yelled, no one was visible now, well, the people that didn't appear in this chappie.

"Whatever! Everyone is so one my side. Even Keo, who wasn't mentionsed in this chapter!" Kyo yelled, diving for Haru, but suddenly made an odd turn towards Yuki, who was happy now, because his ice cream was re-newed...

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

Ren: Well, I know, it's stupid and all...  
Keo: If you like us in it, please tell us!  
Ren: Yea, cuz, it'd be a big help!  
Keo: And this is fast thanks to a rude reviewer...  
Ren: Yea, that hurt a lot, the whole point of this is to be stupid and really pointless,  
Keo: We're 5 years old at heart...  
Ren: You've read, now please review  
Keo: FlAMES ARE WELCOME!!!


	4. Chapter 4

I've been gone, a long time. I'm sorry. But I'm updating, this will be the first of many  so I hope you don't hate me, and this is going to be awfully hard, because I can't the train of though back D: So.... Slowly Falling Away add me lol

Disclaimer: Not mine.

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**Waiting For The Doors****  
Chapter Four:  
By: **せれにたかいし

"Yuki... what is going on?" Kyo looked around the room everything was completely black.

"How are you looking if everything is black?" Haru asked, slapping who he thought was Kyo on the head.

"I shall kill you," Akito murmured, taking Haru's arm and twisting it behind his back.

Tohru screamed as she raised her hand in the air. "Karate CHOP!"

Akito slowly lost his balance and a thump echoed in the dark. "Oh..." tears welled up in Tohru's eyes, "did I kill him?"

"Tohru... did you just kill god?" Yuki smiled, taking the brunette into his arms. "I love..."

Hatori cursed from across the room, "Holy hookers on a midday train to Baltimore!" he cried as he rubbed his shins.

"I think Shigure fell, my poor man!" Ayame shrieked as he sprinted to aide Shigure.

Curplunk. Another Sohma down.

"Why can't we all just get along?" Ritsu was in the corner, bawling his eyes out. His bright pink and orange kimono was clearly evident in the dim room.

"Meow."

"Who hugged the cat?" Yuki asked, scurrying around on the floor.

Haru tried to see past the shadows of the Sohma house, but it was impossible. "Probably Tohru, there aren't any other females here."

"Can I have a pony?" Momiji's voice called from the other side of the room.

"Momiji!" I deep demonic voice interrupted the multiply ramblings. Silence took over the room.

"I will eat you alive," it said, the voice hoarse and slightly hushed.

"Meow."

"Cat, shut it!" Yuki yelled, still in his rat form (from the hug he received earlier from Tohru).

"Meow---ow!"

The lights flickered on and it was evident there was no demon, and surely no Kyo.

"Akito, he's bleeding!" Ayame cried, pointing at the limp body.

Ritsu sobbed in the corner, and Momiji was standing at the light switch, eyes wide. "I'm going to die," he whispered.

"That's what she said..." Kyo laughed, sitting on a sofa.

"I thought you were..." Yuki looked down at the bright yellow cat, obviously it wasn't Kyo.

"Meow."

"I killed a man... woman... what am I going to do. The police will be after me..." tears stained her face as a familiar voice blared.

"Tonight we have, 'That's what she said' Kyo! 'Your Mom' Yuki, 'I'd tap that Tohru.... and..." Drew Carey's voice slowly faded away.

Mumbled erupted from the speakers. "What do you mean Akito is dead? Well, who are we going to put on here? No, Shigure's a pervert... Hatori's not funy. No.. no... okay... And last but not least, 'Sexy can I' Momiji.

"This is Whose Line is it Anyway!"

"What's happening?" Shigure finally spoke up. "This isn't my house... and I'm not a pervert!"

* * *

A/N: As you should know, I haven't been on FF in a long time. I'm dearly sorry for that. As I grew up my love for anima and manga grew more as well. But the love and passion I had for writing about these characters fizzled when I realized that I could make my own people, my own style, without stealing the already made ones from amazing writers. So I took a long, way too long, of a break from what really got me started, and I apologize.

And as of lately, my charm and my spark has disappeared; I have severe writer's block and it's tearing me apart. I've become addicted to the internet, and I hate it so much.

So I vow to make your lives full of laughter and tears once again. I'm going to try my best to return to FF, with the same old characters... maybe a code geass or two. Loveless, more than likely... and there might even be times when I want to take suggests on an anime. But listen, I am so deeply sorry I left my stories unfinished and my fans heartbroken. I'm going to thrive off your love, and I'm starting now.

If I don't keep my word, or you have any suggestions, or rude thoughts for me, please PLEASE send me an email at... I have so many.... _.com or you can send me a private message here. Anything is wanted. And once more, I'm sorry D:


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